Entry One
Dear Diary
Nobody knows who I am the real me. It's like nobody cares enough to find out. I mean does anyone ask me what I want to do with my life or what my opinion is on stuff or what restaurant to order in from? NO!!! No one understand. No one has an older sister's who's a Slayer.
People wouldn't be so crazy about her if they had to live in the same house with her every single day. Everybody cares what she thinks. Just cause she can do backflips and stuff. Like that's such a crucial job skill in the real world plus Mom lets her get away with everything. Your sister's saving the world. I can so save the world if somebody handed me super powers. But I'd think of a cool name and wear a mask to protect my loved ones which Buffy doesn't even.
If this town wasn't so lame everybody would completely know what she does. Then I bet they wouldn't even be that impressed because like killing things with wood. Oh scary vampires they die from a splinter. Riley my sister's boyfriend is so into her. They're always kissing and groping. I bet they've had sex.
Entry Two
Dear Diary
I don't think Buffy's Watcher likes me too much. I think it's cause he's just so old. I'm not sure how old he is but I heard him use the word newfangled one time. So he's gotta be pretty far gone. Willow's the awesomest person. She's the only one I know who likes school as much as me. Even her friends are cool like Tara.
She and Willow are both witches. They do spells and stuff which is so much cooler than slaying. I told mom one time I'd wish they'd teach me some of the things the do together and then she got really quiet and made me go upstairs. I guess her generation isn't cool with Witchcraft.
Xander is so much cuter than anyone and smarter too. He totally skipped college and got a job working construction which is so kind of deep you know. He builds things and he's brave too. Just last week he went under cover to stop that Dracula guy. Xander treats everyone like an equal. He doesn't look down on people even when he should. He says I'm like a kid sister but sometimes I feel like he sees me as I am a woman.
Buffy probably would have got into way more trouble but I guess it was pretty ok for her not to say anything to mom. Anya's gonna be ok and Xander's not mad at me so things must have worked out. Not that Buffy's really changed at all like she ever would. She still thinks I'm Little Miss Nobody, just her dumb little sister. Boy is she in for a surprise.
Entry Three
Dear Diary
I finally got to go shopping with mom. She should have known better than to send me off with Buffy and Giles. The poor guy was found dead on the floor in the magic shop and I was sent outside of course. I guess that's no big surprise since Buffy was around and she never lets me do anything.
That guy outside was really weird. I'm guessing an escaped mental patient. That's the only thing that makes sense since he thought he was a cat and he said I wasn't real. I am here which is like so obvious and he didn't look like a cat to me. No popping up tail anywhere to be found not that I was really looking because that would just be gross.
Whatever! Some people are so strange. At least Tara came out to keep me company and we thumb wrestled. So it looks like I'll be able to go to the magic shop since Giles bought the place. I'm thinking that wasn't the greatest idea since we found the previous owner dead on the floor but whatever.
Maybe I can look around when no ones looking and I can sneak a peek at all the cool stuff that must be in there. Slip a book into my bag since mom went all weird when I wanted Willow and Tara to teach me stuff. I could teach myself and show them all. I will never get why girls wear thongs. Oh joy a string up my butt that's a thrill and I can wear panty liners for my thong. Sure I'm rushing to the store and that's topping the list.
Entry Four
Dear Diary
Now that was scary when Mom passed out like that but I did good. I called the ambulance and rode along. It was cool with the sirens doing the whirry thing. I'm just glad that she's ok. That Ben guy was cute and even let me use his stethoscope which turned out to be a good thing since I'm the one that discovered that Riley's heart was going super fast.
See I do come in handy after all since Buffy wasn't the one to figure this out. I was just trying to help out sharing my government knowledge when Buffy just took off. That Ben was cute but he's no Xander. He's still with Anya unfortunately. Doesn't he know that there is someone that is so perfect for him than her?
Ok I know it can't happen with me since I'm still underage but it could happen someday. It's just that boys my age are such idiots. I hope Riley's ok since that so sucks that he was all experimented on and stuff. I actually kinda like the guy. I just wish he would stop calling me kid. He does make Buffy happy and he doesn't turn evil when they have sex. Which in my opinion is a big plus since going on a killing spree is so not good.
Entry Five
Dear Diary
Well I didn't want to see Buffy do whatever magic she's doing anyway. Stinky much! Couldn't she get a better flavor of incense like chocolate or even people? She thinks she's so special with her Slayerness. Mr Giles' magic shop was pretty cool. It had a lot of magic junk and stuff.
I have better things to do than wasting my time on smelly incense. Is that like a requirement magic stuff? Maybe I'll ask Willow since she's so cool unlike some people. If Buffy can do the slaying thing why not me doing the magic stuff. I could do it better than her.
Later
What is her deal anyway? Buffy barges into my room and totally wigs out and says I'm not her sister. Like it's some special thrill to be related to her. I think I'm going to make some tea since mom will probably be back soon. I hope she gets better soon. Maybe if she's up to it she could look over my paper that I'm doing for English.
Entry Six
Dear Diary
Buffy decided to move back home. Oh the joy of helping her move back in. That's how I like spending my time. They still don't know what's wrong with mom. I hope she gets better soon. I so got the perfect gift for Tara. She's a witch and every witch needs a broom. Too bad there isn't a flying broom like the Nimbus 2000. That would be so cool. I could just climb on and tell it where I want to go or whatever.
And I thought I had it rough with a Slayer as a big sister although my theory about her being a Howler Monkey is still a possibility. Poor Tara with her lousy family telling her that she was a demon. I so don't blame her for doing the spell. I would have done the same thing in her place. I'm just glad that she didn't have to leave. That would have really sucked and Willow would have been crushed. Mom doesn't know but I totally know they are a couple. I'm not stupid and anyway they are so great together.
Entry Seven
Dear Diary
I wish this was all some nightmare or a horror movie on TV. Mom's really sick and I'm scared. Strange things have been happening. Why are people telling me I'm not here and that I don't belong? It was different when those strangers said it but when mom said it it really hurt.
Buffy explained that it was her tumor and that she didn't know what she was saying. I just need to remember that in case she says anything else strange. I'm glad that Buffy was around to kill that scary demon thing. Mom's going to have her operation and I'm terrified. I know that I complain about Buffy but I'm glad to have her and that I'm not alone.
She called Dad but he never called back. I guess he has more important things to do in Spain with his secretary. Willow got me this cool book that I'll try to read to keep my mind off things. She just has to make it through ok. I need her so much and besides I so can't be stuck alone with Buffy since that would so not be any fun at all.
Entry Eight
Dear Diary
Weirdness abounds here in Sunnydale. Mom had her operation and she's doing better. We even went out shopping and mom put on some actual clothes instead of that funky robe. It could be one of those really cheesy horror movies they show at night. In the dead of night it rises from the corner of the room where it has been thrown off.
It goes outside searching for victims to strangle. I could so make a movie out of that and besides there are so many crappy movies out there so why not one more? That was odd. I wonder what mom, Buffy, and Giles were talking about. I heard my name mentioned but it made no sense it was something about a key or whatever. The strangeness of adults.
That was so rotten of Riley to up and leave like that. How utterly lame he is. Well it is so his loss and to think that I was starting to like him. There is this really cute new guy at school but my heart still belongs to Xander. He's still with Anya for reasons unknown to me. Maybe it's just sex or something or the fact that I'm jail bait.
I know that it will never happen but it's a fantasy that resides in my head. The cutie in my art class seems pretty cool. That biach Chrissy is so lame she like lives to mess with people and me in particular. I wonder what's going on since I know there is something going on.
Entry Nine
Dear Diary
That girl that came to the house was strange. She was looking for a key. What's so special about a key? They are used to open doors. Big whoop! I so solved the Buffy birthday sitch. I am going to put shells on a frame with a picture of us. Simple and cheap. Everyone has been acting really weird today.
Anya was even stranger than usual and that's saying a lot since she's just strange. I bet Giles' diary or journal or whatever he calls it has the answers to this weirdness. Maybe I'll break into the magic shop and see what he's written down. I think I know where to look.
He had his book one second and it was gone the next. Maybe I can finally figure out what's going on since no one will tell me. There is something about some Hell God. Maybe that strange chick is the Hell God that Willow mentioned. That would explain why she kicked Buffy's ass.
Entry Ten
Dear Diary
My brain is still reeling from everything. This diary is the only one that didn't suffer fire or water damage. It's the only one I actually wrote although I remember having a diary since I was like seven. So I popped into being about the time Dracula came into town.
I'm so glad that I didn't get into trouble for the whole fire thing. I was upset and wigged out. I'm still upset since I don't know what I am. Am I human? I don't even know and I'm all confused about everything. It just got to me to hear Buffy say that I wasn't her sister. They weren't too thrilled to hear about my breaking into the magic shop with Spike.
I think I'll go see Spike after school. It'll be cool to hang out with him. He's not twitchy like the others. It is so gross that he has blood in a fridge but I guess him being a vampire and all he needs it. I don't think I'd make a good one with the whole blood thing. He is pretty cool though. I just love his hair and that is such a cool jacket that he has. He treats me like a person and not some kind of alien.
Entry Eleven
Dear Diary
Lately things have been like a nightmare. That seems to be a recurring theme. I noticed that Buffy was like numb for a while there. I thought she didn't care since she was all cold but it turned out to be an act for my benefit. She was trying to hold it together but it's not like she can replace Mom.
I was so close to bringing her back but I changed my mind. It was the right thing to do because it wouldn't really be her anyway. It was sweet of Spike to help me though. I think he actually cared about her. He is such a confusing person er vampire being all nice and then making a robot that looked like Buffy.
I doubt that he was playing checkers with it. He's in love or obsessed or whatever he is with her. He was so doing it with the robot which is so gross. There lies the confusion he goes back and forth between being a sweetie and a total repugnant slug.
I guess he's sort of forgiven on account of the torture and not telling Glory about me. So he's not totally evil. Oh great the school called about me cutting so she has to come in to talk to the principal. I sense a lecture coming on which will so suck. It's been a bad time so what's the harm in blowing off a few classes. I suffered a major loss here.
I also found out that my very existence has been a lie which is still kinda confusing although it's nice to know now that I am human. Sometimes I think I was just dreaming and that I'll walk in the kitchen and find mom there. Why did she have to die? I really need and miss her. I know Buffy's trying and doing the best she can but she's not mom but I guess I'm kinda glad that I have her around since dad is still AWOL.
Entry Twelve
Dear Diary
I never thought that I could be taken away. That's why Buffy started acting like a dictator after talking to the principal. I'm just scared and I'm being hunted for who knows what and now this. Everything that has happened has totally been my fault. Spike was beaten senseless and now poor Tara has had her brain sucked out.
Maybe I am evil since everyone I care about suffers and or dies. I'm the reason this happened since they'd all be fine if I didn't exist. I wonder what I am or what I was before I was turned into a girl. Even though Spike and Buffy told me I wasn't to blame I still feel guilty about what's happened.
I'm just glad that Willow wasn't hurt when she went up against Glory. That was so brave of her and very romantic. She loves Tara and when you love someone you want to protect them so I don't blame her for going after that biach.
Me and Buffy are going over to see Willow and Tara tomorrow since they are releasing her from the hospital in the morning. I wonder if she can be fixed. It's so sad. Pain just seems to be a major part of my life especially lately.