Xena

 

Orphan Of War: During this scroll Solan stops hating Xena and considers her to be a friend.

 

Remember Nothing: During this scroll Xena got a taste of what it would be like if she'd never become a warrior and realizes that being a warrior is for the best.

 

Giant Killer: During this scroll a debt is paid to an old friend.

 

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun: During this scroll Bacchus suffers a major setback when Xena kills him.

 

Return Of Callisto: During this scroll Peridcus dies and Callisto sinks into quicksand.

 

Warrior...Princess...Tramp: During this scroll Joxer meets a girl who's the spitting image of Xena and gets a hickey among other things. Ok one lookalike is one thing but a second one is a little strange.

 

Intimate Stranger: During this scroll Callisto escapes from the Underworld and Xena gets a whole new look.

 

Ten Little Warlords: During this scroll Xena finally gets her body back so she immediately takes a long bath which means she wasn't forced to dye her hair.

 

A Solstice Carol: During this scroll a mean King changed his ways and was reunited with is wife.

 

The Xena Scrolls: During this scroll a friendship was forged by Xena and Gabrielle's descendents carrying on in modern times.

 

Here She Comes Miss Amphipolis: During this scroll the best person did win the pageant who cares if Miss Artifice happens to be a guy because wow who wouldn't be totally jealous of that itty bitty waist.

 

Destiny 1: During this scroll Caesar proved just what a charming liar he is.

 

The Quest 2: During this scroll Xena wasn't burned to ashes due to the help of friends who allowed her to borrow their bodies and was able to reclaim her body.

 

A Necessary Evil: During this scroll Callisto's brush with Godhood was short lived since she fell into a lava pit which ought to keep her busy for a while yet.

 

A Day In The Life: During this scroll a frying pan was rendered useless and a piece of scroll was irreparably harmed but the bonds of true friendship never die.

 

For Him The Bell Tolls: During this scroll Joxer went back and forth between a bumbling idiot and a sexy warrior who caused havoc with a Princess and her Prince.

 

The Execution: During this scroll Meleager fell off the wagon but thank the Gods it turned out that he didn't kill that guy after all.

 

Blind Faith: During this scroll a young punk discovered that he wanted to be good because he wasn't cut out for the mudering biz.

 

Ulysses: During this scroll Gabrielle found out that being on water just didn't agree with her.

 

The Price: During this scroll Xena got back in touch with her dark side but she was snapped out of it.

The Lost Mariner: During this scroll Cecrops was finally able to break the spell and touch dry land for the first time in centuries.

 

A Comedy Of Eros: During this scroll it was discovered that love suited Draco.

 

The Furies: During this scroll it was discovered that a person tends to get a bit crazy when the Furies are whispering in their head.

 

Been There, Done That: During this scroll Xena got a bit cranky when the day kept repeating itself over and over again.

 

The Dirty Half Dozen: During this scroll two out of the six got a second chance to make a fresh start which isn't bad for a day's work.

 

The Deliverer: During this scroll Gabrielle got hot and heavy with some flames and lost her blood innocence.

Gabrielle's Hope: During this scroll Gabrielle found herself eating some really strange things and had a very quick pregnancy followed by a strange trip.

 

The Debt 1: During this scroll Gabrielle betrayed Xena when she got to Chin ahead of her.

 

The Debt 2: During this scroll Gabrielle and Xena made up even though her betrayal nearly got Xena killed.

 

The King Of Assassins: During this scroll it was revealed that Joxer had a twin that was quite different from him.

 

Warrior...Priestess...Tramp: During this scroll yet another lookalike turned up and as usually everyone wanted to be Xena.

The Quill Is Mightier: During this scroll everything written down came true and two Gods got a taste of mortality and found that it didn't agree with them.

 

Maternal Instincts: During this scroll a major rift was formed between two best friends when the daughter of one killed the son of the other.

 

The Bitter Suite: During this scroll Xena and Gabrielle tried to kill each other and ended up in a very strange place indeed but thank the Gods they worked things out.

 

One Against An Army: During this scroll Xena took on an army and saved the day.

 

Forgiven: During this scroll an annoying little girl with a taste for human flesh was forgiven.

 

King Con: During this scroll Joxer was badly beaten because he won but he did recover to be dumb another day.

 

When In Rome...: During this scroll Gabrielle took a little trip to the dark side when she allowed a man to die but on the bright side he wasn't exactly a good man.

 

Forget Me Not: During this scroll Gabrielle's trouble caused her to consider forgetting but she decided that you can't have the good without the bad.

Fins, Femmes & Gems: During this scroll obessesions went way over the top but everyone finally snapped out of it followed by a slight headache and Joxer is still puking after hearing what he had been eating.

 

Tsunami: During this scroll the ship tipped over but due to the quick thinking everyone was able to escape with some injuries.

 

Vanishing Act: During this scroll Autolycus once again proved himself worthy of his title as King of Thieves.

 

Sacrifice 1: During this scroll Gabrielle saw her daughter and boy was the resemblence uncanny but thankfully it was only skin deep since they are nothing alike.

 

Sacrifice 2: During this scroll Callisto had a brief moment of feeling good but it was short lived because Xena decided to give her the oblivion she always wanted.

 

Adventures In The Sin Trade 1: During this scroll Gabrielle was missing from the Land of the Dead and Xena met some Amazons.

 

No dead Amazons lost their lives during the making of this motion picture.

 

Adventures In The Sin Trade 2: During this scroll Xena had it out with Alti and had a vision that revealed that Gabrielle was alive.

 

Xena's search for Gabrielle was not harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

A Family Affair: During this scroll Gabrielle had a close encounter with her very creepy grandson.

 

No spike-skinned, beast-like, incredibly hungry offspring who can't stand the sun were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

In Sickness And In Hell: During this scroll everyone had a bad week and it was revealed that Argo's a sucker for apples.

 

No leapin' lice were beaten, smashed or scratched during the production of this motion picture.

 

A Good Day: During this scroll a village was burned to the ground and a good man died.

 

No permanent battle scars were inflicted during the production of this motion picture.

 

A Tale Of Two Muses: During this scroll everyone was finally allowed to dance to their heart's content.

 

No self-righteous magistrates intent on surpressing the basic human right of freedom of expression were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Locked Up And Tied Down: During this scroll Xena went to prison for a murder she didn't commit.

 

No rabid flesh eating crabs were cooked during the production of this motion picture.

 

Crusader: During this scroll a wacko tried to steal Gabrielle away and whipped Xena's butt.

 

Xena's best chewing tooth was not harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Past Imperfect: During this scroll the truth came out and the past came back with a vengeance.

 

Borias' goose was cooked during the production of this motion picture.

 

Key To The Kingdom: During this scroll Meg proved what a good Mother she'd make.

 

Priceless porkers, of either organic or ceramic origin were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Daughter Of Pomira: During this scroll a young girl stopped the bloodshed between two people and gained a second family.

 

If The Shoe Fits: During this scroll Gabrielle's top was sacrificed when Xena ran out of rope.

 

No fractured fables were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Devi: During this scroll Gabrielle was possessed and walked on hot coals.

 

In memory of women's best friend: Bear, Dodger, Kali, Samantha, Taffy, Bear.

 

Between The Lines: During this scroll Xena and Gabrielle got a glimpse of their future selves and Gabrielle's hair was sacrificed to save her life.

 

Xena's chakram got Gabrielle by the short hairs during the production of this motion picture.

 

The Way: During this scroll Xena's arms got cut off but they were restored after a battle with six arms and Gabrielle decided to throw her staff into the river.

 

The Play's The Thing:  During this scrol Gabrielle discovered that her scrolls are meant to be read not acted out on the stage.

 

Although no great literary works of art were harmed or plagirised, a few thespians stole some scenes during the production of this motion picture.

 

The Convert: During this scroll Joxer makes his first kill and has nightmares about it which just goes to show that some aren't cut out for killing.

 

Argo's gastro-intestinal condition was cleared up upon completion of this motion picture.

 

Takes One To Know One: During this scroll Discord tried her hand at retribution and shared that she didn't do animals which came as a bit of a shock.

 

Argo was once again proven innocent during the production of this motion picture.

 

End Game: During this scroll the Amazons suffered a major loss with the death of their Queen Ephiny who will be greatly missed and Pompey really lost his head.

 

Pompey's reign came to a head during the production of this motion picture.

 

Ides Of March: During this scroll Xena and Gabrielle were crucified and Callisto had a front row seat.

 

Xena and Gabrielle were killed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Deja Vu All Over Again: During this scroll Ares tries yet again to get Xena and once again he gets shot down.

 

No sword-wielding, card-playing, therapy-seeking French Freedom Fighters were deflowered during the production of this motion picture.

 

Fallen Angel: During this scroll Xena saves Callisto's soul and becomes a demon but luckily Eli with a little divine help brought them back to life before Xena could do too much damage.

 

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

 

Chakram: During this scroll the broken chakram was fixed and Joxer shared his feelings with Gabrielle.

 

Xena's dark and violent past was restored during the production of this motion picture.

 

Succession: During this scroll Ares saw Gabrielle in a whole new light.

 

Ares' libido was not harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Animal Attraction: During this scroll Xena finds out she's pregnant even though she's been a love free zone for a really, really long time.

 

Although the rabbit died, no other animals were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Them Bones, Them Bones: During this scroll Alti tries to steal Xena's baby's soul to replace with her own but she ends up stuck in amber while the baby's safe and sound.

 

Xena and Alti were bad to the bone during the production of this motion picture.

 

Purity: During this scroll Gabrielle got creative with her foot.

 

To obtain a copy of Joxer's recipe for Moo Shu sauce and other delicacies visit your  local bookstore or look for it at the tavern.

 

Back In The Bottle: During this scroll many bunnies were turned to stone but all in a good cause since it made good practice for the main event.

 

Pao Su's split personality was not harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Little Problems: During this scroll Xena got in touch with her inner child.

 

No pie tins were harmed in the making of Tharon's mask.

 

Seeds Of Faith: During this scroll the father of Xena's baby was revealed and came as quite a surprise.

 

Thanks to Eli's non-violent ways, many people lost their lives during the production of this motion picture.

 

Lyre Lyre Hearts On Fire: During this scroll it was discovered that Joxer had yet another brother who's quite flashy and fun.

 

No lyres were strung out during the production of this motion picture.

 

Punch Lines: During this scroll a God laughed for the very first time adn all it took was a pie in the face.

 

Gabrielle and Argo were shrunk and permanently pressed during the production of this motion picture.

 

God Fearing Child: During this scroll Zeus ate Hera but later was killed by his son Hercules and he died very proud of him.

 

Zeus cashed in his chips during the production of this motion picture.

 

Eternal Bonds: During this scroll Gabrielle was a bitch but hey who isn't at some point and she did admit to it.

 

Ares' virility was harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Amphipolis Under Siege: During this scroll Ares was so close but didn't get his satisfaction.

 

Post-Production was under siege during the production of this motion picture.

 

Married With Fishsticks: During this scroll Joxer was the hero when he saved Gabrielle's life.

 

No sea nymphs or other denizens of the sea were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Life Blood: During this scroll lthe has was painted on but survived to see another day.

 

Warning: The Surgeon General cautions practicing weird and grotesque Amazon Rituals may be hazardous to your health.

 

Kindred Spirits: During this scroll Joxer got caught peeping and lost his life but he was revived.

 

Many cinnamon swirls lost their lives during the making of Gabrielle's headdress.

 

Antony And Cleopatra: During this scroll the weakness for bad boys remained strongly in place.

 

No rubberised snakes intent on destroying the Queen of Egypt were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Looking Death In The Eye: During this scroll Xena and Gabrielle took a nap.

 

Death almost died during the production of this motion picture.

 

Livia: During this scrol twenty-five years passed while Xena and Gabrielle were sleeping and they didn't age a day.

 

Due to an over-indulgence of Bean and Bard Burgers Meg's gastro-intestinal problem intensified during the production of this moton picture.

 

Eve: During this scroll a dear friend was lost but at least he had his happy ending where he got the wife and kids.

 

Joxer's sudden and unexpected death, slowed down his rapid aging process during the production of this motion picture.

 

Motherhood: During this scroll the Furies messed around with Gabrielle's head which always leads to no good.

 

All the Gods were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Coming Home: During this scroll Ares was the last person to get his head messed with by the Furies and thankfully his sanity was restored.

 

Xena and Gabrielle's psyches were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

The Haunting Of Amphipolis: During this scroll Xena killed yet another God.

 

No maggots were harmed during the production of this motion picture, although a few were found stuck in Gabrielle's teeth.

 

Heart Of Darkness: During this scroll after a little partying a new King of Hell was sent to his kingdom.

 

All hell broke loose during the filming of this motion picture.

 

Who's Ghurkan: During this scroll Gabrielle overcame the urge to murder in cold blood even though the guy totally deserved it.

 

Xena's uncanny ability to recover from devestating wounds was not harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Legacy: During this scroll a sandstorm caused a scroll to appear as a knife which resulted in the death of an innocent.

 

Despite severe air turbulence, no sand dunes were harmed during the production of this motion picture, although some experienced periodic bouts of motion sickness.

 

The Abyss: During this scroll Gabrielle was seasoned and nearly became dinner for a tribe of cannibals.

 

Virgil's appetite was surpessed during the production of this motion picture.

 

The Rheingold: During this scroll Xena went north and Gabrielle followed.

 

No flying horses were harmed during the making of this motion picture, although several villagers were bombarded with aerial manure.

 

The Ring: During this scroll Gabrielle took a nap in a ring of fire.

 

Return Of The Valkyrie: During this scroll Xena kissed Gabrielle and got her memory back.

 

Any similarity between our story and the classical children fairy tale is purely coincidental.

 

Old Ares Had A Farm: During this scroll Ares made a friend and discovered some gray hairs.

 

Ares went to the dogs in the making of this motion picture.

 

Dangerous Prey: During this scroll the psycho hunting people met a pointy ending.

 

Raczar mysteriously disappeared at the completion of production of this motion picture and is rumoured to have been living under the guise of "Prince Vladimir Barbeque Raczar?"

 

God You Know: During this scroll Aphrodite got her mind back but she lost her Godly powers.

 

Gabrielle's undercover disguise was extensively harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

You Are There: During this scroll the golden apples gave Ares and Aphrodite their Godhoods back since balance is needed in the world.

 

Path Of Vengeance: During this scroll Ares was up to his old tricks again.

 

The disclaimer for this episode was harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

To Helicon And Back: During this scroll Gabrielle found out that war is tough on the soul.

 

No shark bait was harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Send In The Clones: During this scroll Xena and Gabrielle rode off into the sunset and a brand new world.

 

No Xena fans were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Last Of The Centaurs: During this scroll the Centaur Nation suffered a serious blow leaving only two survivors and the end of a proud and noble race.

 

The centaur population was severely harmed during the making of this motion picture.

 

When Fates Collide: During this scroll Caesar once again met a bad ending.

 

As the Fates would have it, Caesar was once again harmed during the production of this motion picture.

 

Many Happy Returns: During this scroll Gabrielle's need to out joke Xena bit her in the butt.

 

No fish guts were harmed in the making of this motion picture.

 

Soul Possession: During this scroll Ares was foiled once again.

 

A Friend In Need 1: During this scroll Gabrielle finally learned how to do the pinch.

 

Xena and Gabrielle's Flying Circus and Amateur Flying Brigade will be arriving in your town soon.

 

A Friend In Need 2: During this scroll Xena died and stayed that way although she remains at Gabrielle's side.

 

Xena was permanently harmed in the making of this motion picture, but kept her spirits up.